Day 41-Mortality or Morbidity?

This little critter ate it, Frankford Avenue just north of Linden

When I came across this pitiful sight, my reaction was alarm, closely followed by nausea. But I subject you readers to this only as a reminder of the inevitable.

Truth be told, most of my internal reflection revolves around the moment of death--and I would venture to say that I'm in good company when it comes to this type of contemplation. It's the everlasting mystery and there's only one way to find out the truth...

Sometimes I envy those who are able to make the leap of faith, to place it all in God's hands and believe that they'll be reunited with their loved ones and childhood pets at some great heavenly bar-b-que in the sky.

And for the record, I think that the heaven scene in Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey is a pretty awesome conception of the afterlife.

But the absolute, observable, substantiated terrestrial truth of the matter is that we simply don't know!

The idea haunts me, preoccupies me to no end. I would not say that it's a morbid fascination. For those who don't know me personally, I should probably mention that I cared for my grandmother during the last year of her life. She passed away in September, 2010, shortly after her 85th birthday.

Little Бабця admiring the summertime garden, July 2010

My grandmother was a tremendous influence in my life, and her passing was like the loss of a mother. Her agrarian, superstitious wisdom guided me through my own life, and at her deathbed I absorbed a portion of her spirit.

See, everyone gets a little religious when death hits close to home!

Since my grandmother's passing, I feel like I peer into the future: watching my body age, my significant other's too. I witness his daughter experiencing adolescent rebellion, learning how to drive, graduating high school. I stand at my father's bedside when he is too old to care for himself... It goes on and on. I feel like I am running out of time.